Just Another Zombie Love Story sample.

7/31/2011

You wanted it (I doubt it), you asked for it (a flatout lie), so you've got it (aren't you just overjoyed?).  A little taste of Just Another Zombie Love Story.  I debated with myself for a long time trying to choose an excerpt to share.  At first I wanted to post the beginning to see if I could get a little feedback on how well I hooked you into the story.  Then I decided that you probably want a little zombie action as whet your appetite.  Am I right? So here you go.  Here is the first scene in the book with the walking dead in it.

 Sunday September 16, 2012  4:30am

If the circumstances weren't so fucked up I would be writing this with quite a bit of excitement right now.  Jessica is asleep in my bed next to me.  I told her I wouldn't sleep until she got up in a few hours.  This has really turned into a nightmare.  We are essentially barricaded in my apartment.  And I don't know what the fuck is going on outside.  Let me go back a bit.

I walked into my bedroom to lay down around one o’clock.  All of the TV stations had given away to the Emergency Broadcast system by then.  It was the same message being broadcast on every channel.  “Stay inside.  Avoid contact with others. Marshall Law has been instituted nationwide.  Stay tuned for further instructions.”  This message was even plastered up on the Discovery Channel.  I tried the radio and my ears were assaulted by this same message repeated over and over again up and down the tuner.  I found one station that was still on the air, unfortunately it was a Spanish station.  I could only make out one in twenty words or so.  Those words that I did make out weren’t encouraging either.  The DJ was talking so fast and he couldn’t keep the terror out of his voice.  I heard “muerto” and “apocalipsis” and I think I even heard “zombie”.  As entertaining as listening to the raving Mexican was, I decided to try to go to sleep. 

Jessica called around 1:30am.  I had been laying awake contemplating the events of the past thirty six hours when the phone made me just about jump out of my skin.  I grabbed my cell phone and accepted the call even though I didn’t recognize the number.  She was frantic.  It took me a minute to figure out who it was that was screaming at me though the phone.  She was ranting something about men trying to get in and the police not answering.  I told her to calm down and tell me what was happening.  She took a deep breath and started over a little calmer.  It was about this point that I recognized her voice.  She said there were some people trying to get into her apartment.  She used the word zombies.  That word flipped a switch in my brain.  Thousands dying, and now zombies?  I couldn't bring myself to believe it.  Jake and I had spent countless hours preparing for the “inevitable” zombie apocalypse when we were kids.  There could be no way it was actually happening.  I got her to tell me that her place was locked and that she was locked in the back bedroom.  I told her that I was coming to get her and that I would stay on the phone the entire way to her place.  Best laid plans right?

Well, it turns out that the word she and that terrified Mexican on the radio had used was indeed correct.  Everyone that had died?  Yeah, they were up and walking around now.  They are pretty slow moving.  Thank God (or whoever) for that small miracle.  I had grabbed my softball bat before leaving the apartment and I went out into the dark.  I gotta tell you that when faced with this event, no amount of disaster preparedness is enough.  There were ‘people’ walking around inside my apartment complex.  Inside the gate.  Shrouded in shadows I sensed movement from every direction.  Luckily, I parked close to my front door and there were none of them (are they really dead?) between the door and Xena, my Xterra.  Jess was either calmer or she was going into shock.  I got into my car and locked all the doors with the push of one button.  I turned the key and slammed the gear into reverse without pausing.  I hit the gas and backed up 15 feet, threw it into drive and sped through the complex avoiding the shambling figures as I went.  I got to the exit gate and stopped while the sensor detected me and the iron gate slowly slid out of my way.  The other side of the gate was illuminated by my headlights and the way was clear.  To my right however, I could see the apartment manager shuffling toward me.  At the rate he was moving, I would be out of the gate and it would be closed behind me before he got to where I was.

Thud, went the hand on my window to the left.  It wasn’t hard, but it was so sudden that I almost pissed myself.  I let out a girlie scream and depressed the gas pedal hard and shot out of the complex. My passenger side mirror clipped the gate on my way through and ripped it clean off.

My scream apparently jarred something in Jess, as she began to barrage me with questions.  I spent the entire drive to her apartment trying to calm her down again.  Her complex wasn't gated.  I had been planning to go in and calm her down and maybe just hang out there for the night until we figured out what the hell was going on.  I immediately changed my mind.   First, her apartment complex wasn’t gated and mine was.  I needed to feel safe until I came up with a plan.  Bars and a gate seemed like a good start.  Second, my apartment was in a suburb and hers was downtown close to the hospital.  Two plus two  still equals 4 in my book and I don't want to be anywhere near a morgue if in fact this turns out to be Z-Day.  All of a sudden it was a rescue mission.  I tried to get all of this across to Jessica en route, but she didn't seem all that responsive to the idea of leaving her home. 

When I got to her place it was worse than I had feared.  They were everywhere.  And to top it off I heard breaking glass through the phone followed by Jess screaming that they were getting into her living room.  I told her to calm down and try to be quiet until I got to her.  The only good thing about this whole scenario was the fact that she lived on the bottom floor at the front of the complex.  Good and bad I suppose.  Good that I didn't have to spend much time finding it, and bad that it was stop number one for ‘them’.

I pulled into the parking lot and saw where her apartment was and saw about 20 of ‘them’ in front of her window pushing their way in.  A couple of them fell over forward into Jess’ apartment because they didn't have the wherewithal to step over the sill.  It seemed like we had the intellectual advantage at least.  One good thing.  My headlights lit them up and they took notice.  Almost as one, they all turned and started shambling toward my SUV.  I told Jess to be ready.  And when I honked my horn from right outside her living room, to come running.  She was frantic, and I had a hard time convincing her to agree to this.  In the end, she agreed and I had an idea.  I explained it to her and sat in my idling vehicle as the zombies made their slow way toward my SUV.  My heart was racing in my chest.  I'm sure it would have exploded right out if I had heard another thud on my window.  This time I kept an eye out both side windows and in my rear view.  Watching the zombies (okay, I fucking said it, they are zombies) shamble closer.  I counted down into the phone from ten to one.  While doing this I primed my nerves for what was next.  When I got to one, I slammed down on the gas and shot forward.  The first zombie went down without flinching as I approached and hit it with the front end of my car.  And the next did the same.  Several glanced off to either side and I hit the curb and bounced up onto the grass.  I almost lost control of Xena then and had to take my foot off the gas.  I slowed and bounced over a few more of them and slammed my foot down on the brake and skidded to a halt about two yards from Jess' broken living room window.  At the same time I laid on the horn and screamed into the phone for her to get out there NOW!!!

I expected this part to be more difficult.  She apparently hadn't waited for the horn.  She was out the window and reaching for the passenger handle mere seconds after I stopped.  I threw the phone down when I saw her.

“Get IN Jess!!!  GET IN!” I screamed at her as she tried the handle and I tried to look every direction at once.

“I can't!”, she screamed back at me.  “IT'S LOCKED!”

“FUCK!”, I reached for the button and the door unlocked and flew open at once.  She jumped in with one last look behind the vehicle.  She screamed and slammed the door shut behind her.

“You asshole!  Get us out of here!  GO!” and she slapped me in the shoulder.

All of this didn't really register at the time.  I was already putting the car in reverse and backing up as fast as I could.  A few zombies went under in the process and we got out of there.

There was no one on the road.  No vehicles at least.  Was it that there wasn’t anyone else alive?  Or was I the only one stupid enough to go out?  I’m guessing at this point that the latter is the more likely.  Damn my over inflated sense of chivalry.  That was the last time.  Jake and I always said, “Chivalry will get you killed.”  We got back to my apartment complex quickly and into the gate easily enough.  There were more zeds out and about but not nearly as many as at Jess'.  I pulled my car all the way up to my front door.  Fuck parking places now.  I didn't have to use the bat at all.  We got in the front door and went up the stairs to the left into my living room.  I have never been happier in my life to not live on the bottom floor.  I propped a dining room chair under the handle of the door just to make myself feel better.  A little bit anyway.

Now, I have a sleeping beauty, pun definitely intended, in bed next to me and an uncertain future ahead of me (us?).

Fuck, what a day! It is probably best not to think too much about the future right now.  I need to sleep.  One thing I know for certain though.  NO MORE CHIVALRY!

Thank you to any of you who actually read all that.  Please take a few moments to let me know what you think.

Stay scared my friends!

My Little Demon


myltldmn@gmail.com

To Blog or Not to Blog

5/25/11

That is my question.

I don't have a plethora of knowledge to bestow upon the world.  My humor doesn't cater to millions of people, but only a very narrow group of people.  The only purpose that blogging has served me is getting me in the mindset to write.  In the past I have tried using my blogging for therapeutic reasons.  And that worked and served it's purpose.  The problem there is, that even I found myself boring.  That's a huge problem.

I keep hearing that a writer needs a platform in order to land a publishing deal.  Ok, fine.  I've increased my Facebook "friends" and my Twitter "followers".  Blog followers has proven to be extremely elusive.  Mainly because I don't really have anything interesting to say.  I've got stories locked in my head just rattling their chains to be unleashed on the world.  But I have an extremely hard time releasing them in this format.  Mainly because I don't proofread my blog.  I don't edit it in any way.  It is exactly as the words form in my head.  In other words it is all crap.

I think that if I were to continue to post my fiction here, I would be producing the opposite of followers.  I would create a list of ignorers (oh yeah, I just made up a new word).  Suck it Websters!

I don't see this format as a springboard to much of anything for me.  I know it has worked for others, but frankly, I don't have the time to agonize over the words that make up this blog.  If you have read this in the past, I sincerely apologize.  I've ranted, I've raved and I've said pretty much a whole bunch of nothing since I started writing sporadically on this blog in October.

If you are still reading, then I have one question for you (unless you are my wife of course):  Why?  I've just rambled on over 300 words and said absolutely nothing.

I've been polishing the beginning of my Zombie Apocalypse novel to submit it to Publishers.  I've toyed with the idea of blogging as if I were actually in the middle of the Zapocalypse.  That wouldn't be unique on the web either.  It's funny really.  We all start out life thinking the world revolves around us and that we are unique and special.  But the older we get the more we realize that it is really extremely difficult to be unique.  Every great idea I've ever had, has been done already.  I guess that is the danger of living on a planet with 6 billion or so people.  How am I any different than any of them?  Ok, maybe I am different from most of them.  Say 99.99%.  Here's where my accounting background comes into play.  .01% of the human population is still a whopping 600,000 people.  That means that any idea I may come up with, there are potentially 600k people who may have beaten me to that idea.  I can narrow that down a bit too, though in an attempt to make myself feel important.  Of those 600k people that are essentially like me let's say only 1% actually have the drive to act upon an idea.  That's still 60k people.  I can live with that.  but I need to beat the other 59,999 bastards out there to something.  Something that WILL set me apart from everyone else.

I know my wife is the only one still reading, but even that makes me feel good.  If by some chance there is still anyone else reading, please drop me a line here, on Facebook or Twitter.

I think I may revist my last blog post after I walk the dog.  Talk to you (or myself soon)

My Little Demon

Step one: Figure out where you want to go!

4/21/2011

I'm back after far too long away.  So many excuses not to write every day.  But you know what?  That's all they are.  Excuses.  Instead of farting around on Farmville, I could have been blogging.  Instead of sitting around watching a movie I could have spent two hours writing.  Instead of wasting time staring at the plethora of games on my iPhone, I could have been brainstorming ideas of how to escape the rat race.

Today I decided, "No more excuses!"

And that was quite invigorating, because I actually felt that statement deep in my soul!  You know what my very next thought was?  "Holy fuck!  If I have no more excuses, then I really have to accomplish something.  Because if I don't, then I will invariably start up with the excuses again.  I don't want to be a failure."

Where the hell do I go from here?  I know where I want to wind up.  This isn't like one of my stories.  I can't just fill in the middle parts that get me to the happy ending I am craving.  It's more like trying to follow a GPS device into a new neighborhood.  I often ran into that while living in Las Vegas.  When I moved there, the city was still growing, and the GPS softwares couldn't keep up with the growth.  I often drove around for awhile before I realized I was on the right track.  Or the wrong one occasionally.  And you know what?  That is a lot like life.  We may know where we want to get to (though a lot of people don't even know that), and we have a general direction in which to travel.  But all the GPS satellites have just crashed and burned up in the atmosphere.  Tough shit for us right?  So much like our pioneering ancestors we set off in what we think is the right direction and pretty much wing it from there.  We try to keep the destination in mind as we meander through the side streets, highways, dirt roads and game trails of life.

One word about my writing right now for any new readers I may have, or those of you that have forgotten how I write.  If you don't like analogies, you may just want to click back to Facebook, or Twitter or wherever you have come from.  I am full of them.  I tend to use them in my every day life all the time.  I don't even realize it sometimes.  I can always find something to relate anything to in order to paint a picture, or better explain something to someone.  This is just what I do.

So the first thing that I need to do is decide on a destination.  What would my perfect world be like?  Then, I need to decide if that life is reasonably attainable.  If it is, then I need to figure out the general direction I need to head to eventually wind up there.  If it isn't reasonable as I desire it in my perfect imagination, then how do i need to tweak it in order to make it attainable in my lifetime.

Don't you have a dream life?  Is it detailed?  Or is it a vague idea.  If it's a general vague idea - such as just sitting on the beach every day like my wifey - then flesh it out a bit more.  It may be Hawaii, but sitting on the beach in the middle of the night, couldn't possible appeal to you... could it?  So in the comment section below tell me - in as many or as few words as you'd like - what your dream life would consist of.  Remember this is the perfect world revolving completely around you.  Be selfish!  I expect to read about everyone wanting to be as rich as Donald Trump or Bill Gates and having a dozen houses spread around the world.

Scared to pour your heart out?  Afraid that your dream sucks?  Afraid that it is too big to be a realistic thing? Well, DUH!  Next time through through we will pare it down to something that IS attainable.  Still don't want to "put yourself out there"?  Ok, I'll go first.

I am going to be completely selfish here and just assume that the wifey and kids are part of this dream somewhere.  I am not going to mention them in this, but rest assured they are there... somewhere.  Next time I will flesh out where they come in.  Or maybe the time after that.

I can't decide between three destinations, so I am going to combine them into one eclectic mess.  I want to be a farmer, bartender and writer.  Ok, maybe not bartender, but bar owner.  How am I going to manage all of this success?  Sounds like a lot of work right?  Well, I have come to realize about myself that I NEED a lot of work.  I am not the type of person who can sit and do nothing for long periods of time.  Days at the beach sunning myself is not my idea of fun.  Don't get me wrong, the beach is a very fun place to be, but I always have to be doing something while there.  The kids love this because I will make sand castles and throw rocks and still do all the "kid stuff".  So staying busy is something that I see in my perfect world.  I would like to have a small "homestead" on which I grow all my own fruits and veggies.  I will leave the raising of livestock to neighbors.  I will also need a few friends or laborers to tend the homestead while I am gone.  And where will I be gone to?  To oversee one of my many bars around the world.  I'm thinking four or five would be perfect.  Let's see where do I want them?  One in whatever town our homestead is located near - in this example, let's say somewhere along the border between Colorado and Wyoming.  One in San Antonio, because that is where my wife's family is and we would want to visit there a lot and I would like to give back to the place that has taught me so much about bartending and cocktails.  Let's see, someplace warm - a barefoot bar in Hawaii should do nicely.  Europe - Scotland or Ireland.  And I think Australia, though I don't have my heart set on that one.  So now we have travel plans one to two weeks every month.  During the other 2-3 weeks of the month about half the day would be spent tending the homestead.  That leaves half days free while at home.  I would spend half that time writing.  Writing novels.  Writing blogs.  It doesn't matter.  Just writing.  Getting all the stories out of my head and onto paper.  Writing to blog readers.  Writing to free my soul.  Kinda like this blog tonight.

Ok, it's your turn.  Next time, I will whittle down my ultimate dream to something that I think I can actually attain.  That'll be step two.

Until then, please share your dream.  Maybe you can develop a direction over the coming days, weeks and months as I do the same.

Thank you for reading.

My Little Demon
1218

What a day!

2/13/2011
The Good, The Bad and The Writing

The Good

So I worked at a Client's office this morning, and then came home to my wife, son and house guest.  Then it became time to show said house guest around San Antonio.  Did I mention that this house guest is one of the best friends I have ever had, and I just realized yesterday that we will have known each other for twenty years this November.  At which time I started my first job and he was my boss. Here's where I tell everyone that the best first job for anyone is working at a movie theater.  I look back VERY fondly on those three years and six days!

So anyways, I came home from working and then we all went to Lulu's cafe.  A place that I never even knew existed, but our guest had seen it on the the Food Network.  As I learned today they are known for their cinnamon rolls.  Texas-sized cinnamon rolls.  Today was the first day I have actually seen any proof about the saying that "everything is bigger in Texas" (And I have lived here now for 2 years and 13 days).
First, as we were walking to our table (after a 15 minute wait outside the diner) we saw their chicken fried steak.  Can I just say that this CFS would have fed Paul Bunyan.  My wife and friend shared it and there was enough leftovers in my fridge now that will be a full meal for someone.  I am not exaggerating!   I don't like CFS, so I didn't indulge in this gravy drowned friedness.

After the meals were consumed we ordered dessert.  ONE CINNAMON ROLL.  Not each.  Let me repeat.  ONE CINNAMON ROLL.  For the whole table.  This three pound beast was easily 12" X 8".  With more frosting than your average birthday cake.  I cut it into quarters and dished it onto the serving plates.  It hung over the edge of each of them.  None of us finished our servings.  All four of us have breakfast tomorrow!

After this we drove downtown and toured the Alamo.  The full tour took about a half hour.  Again, no one knew how to find the basement.  One of these days!  Then up and down the Riverwalk.  We even took a River tour.  Which was my first time.  I thought I had been on one before, but I don't recall ever hearing any of the info that was given to us today.

All in all it was a good day!  Got my friend signed up on Facebook - FINALLY!

The Bad

no

The Writing

I got nuttin.








Stay scared my friends,
My Little Demon
myltldmn@gmail.com

Taxes, Writing Platforms and Writing Critique Groups

2/9/2011
The Good, The Bad and The Writing

I am completely abandoning the format of my blog for tonight.  I have a couple things I need to write about and I am curious if anyone is even reading this.  I see that only SEVEN people read my last post.  SEVEN.  That will not do!  I need to be more interesting.  I am going to reinvent this blog completely.  How?  Who the fuck knows!?!?!?!  Not me.  But I need to do it.  I need a traffic of about 1000 people a day to hit my page.  I'll get to why later.

First of all:  My taxes are DONE!!!!!!!!  February 9th is a new record for me.  I've been filing my taxes since 1992, and this year is the earliest I have ever gotten them submitted.  Ok that was a bit anticlimactic for anyone reading this, but I am pretty fucking jazzed about it!  I consider myself a professional procrastinator and I got my W-2 TODAY!  I don't know what the hell is wrong with me!

Ok, onto topic #2: Writing platforms!  I read this article last night and it scared the fuck out of me: http://www.andrewjackwriting.com/2011/02/what-the-word-platform-means-for-writers/.  Basically the article boils down to the simple rule of business: in order to get published you need to prove to the publisher that you have an audience.  How do you prove that?  Well, you have to have a platform.  I am pretty new to this whole writing thing.  Or at least trying to get published.  So WTF!? is a platform?  Let's use a metaphor shall we?  I know my wife isn't tired of me using those.  NOT!

Let's look at the word: PLATFORM!  What does that make you think of?  The initial image in my head is a gallows, but let's remove the sick fuckery that is in my head and move on to the second thing that comes to mind.  Which in this case is actually the Lincoln-Douglas debates.  Funny how my fucked up mind works isn't it?  I picture two presidential candidates standing on pedestals trying to convince a group of onlookers why they would be the better choice to represent them in the White House.  That analogy works better for the purposes of this one sided discussion.  These two candidates had a platform to stand on to reach a group of people.  Each town they stopped in gave them a platform to stand on in order for them to be heard.  The people that heard them, then got to decide which candidate was right for them.  A platform for a writer is similar.  Not quite as glamorous, but similar.  We need a group of individuals that are going to be predisposed to buy whatever slop we may be putting into print.  Or at least a group of people that are willing to listen to us pitch whatever it is we have to offer.  I can't say it any better than the article that I have linked to (mainly because I am drunk, tired and generally lack the motivation to try tonight when someone else has done a great job).  So, after you read the article (and come back to read my ramblings), leave me some feedback.  what do you think would be a good way to create a platform.  What type of blog would you like to read on a daily basis.  Or would you rather it be not that frequently?  I don't know.  I started this blog for mainly therapuetic purposes, and it has been mainly that since October.  Well, it is time to start playing like a grown-up.  I gotta play the publishers game until I prove to them that I am a great writer (sober at least).

And last but not least, I would like to know if there is anyone out there that would like to start a Horror Writers Critique Group with me.  I need semi-anonymous people to help me edit my work, until I have made the next couple steps into the realm of becoming a professional writer.  If anyone is interested, please send me an email.


Stay scared my friends,
My Little Demon
myltldmn@gmail.com

No Super Bowl for Me, It's Writing Time

2/6/2011
The Good, The Bad and The Writing

The Good

I don't know how to narrow this down to any particular thing today!  There is just a general good feeling in my being today.  I am happy with my day.  It was a pretty lazy day.  Aside from my Client no showing this morning.  But that's ok.  I got to return home and go back to bed for a few more hours.  I am well rested.  I am feeling close to the wifey.  I am writing now.  What more could a guy ask for?
Every day we get closer to closing on the house.  Then I will be a home owner again.  Yay!  This will be my wife's first home and my first in about seven years, since the divorce.  I have a self imposed deadline for my writing.  And a hard and fast goal to go along with it.  I need to get the second draft finished this month.  I am behind, but I am confident that I can catch up.  The plan for after the second is complete is to have someone else read it and rip it to shreds.  Then I recover my ego and rewrite it one more time before mid April.  I will then have something tangible to take to the World Horror Convention in Austin the last weekend in April.  There I will hopefully find an agent to sit with and try to begin the process of getting Just Another Zombie Love Story into print for the world to read.
Right now the rest of America is gearing up to watch the Super Bowl.  I am gearing up to tackle my rough draft.  I am sitting in the Starbucks inside the Barnes & Noble at La Cantera.  I seem to do my most productive writing here.  So I am going to breeze through this post and get down to the business at hand.

The Bad

I'm in a happy place right now and nothing is really bothering me that much at the moment.

The Writing

This is being reserved for JAZLS rewrite.  I'll work on some other story ideas here soon, I promise.


Stay scared my friends,

My Little Demon
myltldmn@gmail.com

367

Brrrr

2/2/2011
The Good, The Bad and The Writing

I'm calling tonight's blog on account of cold.   I love it.  It's 23 degrees outside.  I just stepped outside to feel it and I LOVE IT!  Snow flurries possible tomorrow.  Let's see if the weather channel or NOAA or the local weather guys are right?  The local weather guys want us to believe we might get 1-2 inches of accumulation tomorrow.  NOAA says chance of flurries.  Weather channel says only 10-20% chance.  I am not going to get my hopes up.


Stay scared my friends,

My Little Demon
myltldmn@gmail.com